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Why the Boring Factor Might Doom Hillary
by Klaus Marre
The GOP has lit a fire under its base that’s burning much brighter than their Democratic counterparts. What does this mean for the 2016 elections?

WHO

ISIS Wants a Truce
It is April Fool’s Day and ISIS is a purveyor of slick propaganda, but it does look like ISIS has floated the idea of a truce in the latest edition of its English-language magazine Dabiq. The truce article was written by one of their remaining hostages—British photojournalist John Cantlie. It’s hard to know what to make of it. Is it a ploy? A false flag? Is the Islamic State hurting militarily? And is his name really “Cant-lie?”

Blackwater Is Still Getting Rich Screwing Up Our War on Afghan Drugs
Surprise! Blackwater sucked up over half a billion bucks in US contracts, but did little to stop terrorist-supported trade in Afghan opium. The details of the Blackwater money pit are found in a new report by the Special Inspector General for Afghanistan Reconstruction (SIGAR). They followed the money around Afghanistan—and we ain’t talking chump change. They tracked $66 billion in contractor-enriching projects.

Did JPMorgan Try to Bribe Dem Power-Brokers? (Depends What Your Definition of ‘Bribe’ Is)
JPMorgan Chase may have unintentionally let the cat out of a cash-stuffed bag when they threatened to withhold campaign donations to the Democrats unless they reigned in the rhetoric of Sen. Sherrod Brown (D-OH) and Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-MA). You’ve heard of pay-to-play? Apparently, there is another deal on offer… pay to not say that the banks are robbing America blind.

Muhammadu Buhari: Reformed Dictator Returns to Power in Democratic Nigeria
“Reformed dictator” may sound a bit like an oxymoron, but the newly-elected leader of Nigeria is anything but a moron. His “iron-fisted” track record, Muslim faith and animosity toward Boko Haram all contributed to his election over the increasingly feckless incumbent, Goodluck Jonathan. In 1983, Buhari led a military coup and ruled as dictator for nearly two years. The jury is still out on whether “he is a converted born-again democrat.”

WHAT

April Fool’s Day: 10 Stories That Look Like Pranks But Aren’t
When it comes to making news on April 1st, a fool and his common sense are soon parted. As such, the BBC decided to take a look at ten fantastical stories that would be easy to dismiss, but that turn out to be true. Yes, British Prime Minister David Cameron is related to Kim Kardashian, the Swedes want to ban dancing and that great drum solo is, in fact, being played by a dog. And politicians are still the champs at playing the fool.

WHY

From a Medieval Text, a Weapon Against a Modern Superbug Emerges
The secret to dealing with a future filled with terrifying antibiotic-resistant superbugs may be buried in a distant past filled with Vikings and epic poems. Researchers uncovered a recipe for an amazing anti-microbial salve in the brittle 1,000-year-old pages of “Bald’s Leechbook” at the University of Nottingham’s Institute for Medieval Research. Now doctors can “get Medieval” on the superbugs plaguing the hospitals of Los Angeles.

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